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What is it called when you get angry while breastfeeding?

Understanding Anger During Breastfeeding
Breastfeeding is often portrayed as a serene bonding experience between mother and child, but for some women, it can evoke unexpected feelings of anger and agitation. This phenomenon is known as breastfeeding aversion and agitation (BAA). It is characterized by feelings of irritability, frustration, or even rage that can arise during nursing sessions, particularly in certain circumstances.
What Triggers Breastfeeding Aversion?
Breastfeeding aversion can occur for various reasons. Some mothers report experiencing these feelings when they are breastfeeding while pregnant or when they are tandem feeding a newborn and a toddler. The emotional and physical demands of nursing multiple children can lead to heightened stress and discomfort, which may manifest as anger.
Additionally, the emotional landscape of postpartum life can contribute significantly to these feelings. Many women experience postpartum rage, a condition marked by intense anger and frustration following childbirth. This can be exacerbated by the challenges of breastfeeding, including physical pain, fatigue, and the overwhelming responsibilities of new motherhood.
The Emotional Complexity of Breastfeeding
The experience of breastfeeding is deeply personal and can be influenced by a myriad of factors, including hormonal changes, physical discomfort, and mental health. For some mothers, the act of breastfeeding may trigger feelings of being trapped or anxious, leading to a sense of agitation. This emotional turmoil can be particularly pronounced in a society that often idealizes motherhood, leaving little room for the acknowledgment of negative feelings associated with breastfeeding.
Seeking Help and Understanding
While breastfeeding aversion is not widely discussed, it is increasingly recognized as a legitimate experience that many mothers face. Understanding that these feelings are not uncommon can be a relief for those who experience them. Support from healthcare providers, counseling, and even medication can help manage these emotions.
In conclusion, while breastfeeding is often seen as a nurturing act, it can also bring about complex emotions, including anger. Recognizing and addressing these feelings is crucial for the well-being of both mother and child, allowing for a healthier breastfeeding experience.

Does D-MER go away?

Some mums with D-MER have mild symptoms. For example, they may describe it as a ‘sigh. Others may experience severe symptoms of D-MER (eg suicidal thoughts or thoughts of self-harm). Symptoms of D-MER may decrease by about 3 months after the birth or they may keep going for as long as the mum is breastfeeding.

Can breastfeeding hormones cause anger?

Women are often told to expect that breast-feeding will bring about warm and fuzzy feelings, thanks to the bonding hormone oxytocin — and most of the time, that’s true. But it’s in stark contrast to what women with D-MER might feel, which can range from sadness to anger to hopelessness.

Why does breastfeeding put me in a bad mood?

A little understood phenomenon is Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex (D-MER). Mothers suffering from this physiological condition feel intense sadness and low mood from just before a breastfeed and for a couple of minutes of it starting, some experiencing it again with subsequent let downs through the feeding session.

What does nursing anger mean?

To nurse a grudge is to have and maintain a feeling of anger, bitterness, or resentment toward someone for something they did, especially a wrong that you think they committed against you. The word nurse is used in the phrase as a verb meaning to keep steadily in mind or memory.

Why is breastfeeding so triggering?

Breastfeeding can also trigger a condition known as dysphoric milk ejection reflex or DMER. DMER is like aversion, triggering a range of negative feelings: Despair, despondency, and hopelessness are commonly reported. As a condition, though, DMER is prompted by your milk ejection reflex — hence the name.

What does D-MER feel like?

DMER can feel like sadness (dysphoria), irritation, anxiety, and even anger. It can come with an overwhelming urge to push the nursing infant off, or immediately stop the feeding session. Occasionally nursing parents may even have thoughts of self-harm.

Can breastfeeding cause mood swings?

Oxytocin and prolactin
While breastfeeding, these hormones promoted feelings of contentment, peace, and intimacy. As these hormone levels drop, some individuals experience complex physical and emotional symptoms including moodiness, sadness, or insomnia.

What is nursing syndrome?

This loss of confidence and persistent self doubt can be bad enough to end a career, even if a nurse is otherwise doing an exemplary job. Nursing imposter syndrome is real, and it’s important to know the signs and symptoms to support your colleagues and keep yourself on a positive trajectory.

Why do I get so angry while breastfeeding?

Dysphoric milk ejection reflex, or D-MER, is a condition that affects people who breastfeed (chest feed) or pump milk. It causes sudden and intense negative emotions just before you “let down” or release milk. It’s quick and lasts just a minute or two.

What is dysregulated breastfeeding?

Because a vigorous sucking pattern without stopping is a new descriptor for a dysregulated breastfeeding pattern, this study has identified a behavior that—if future research is supportive—care providers and lactation specialists should assess.

Natasha Lunn

Tash is an IBCLC and Business Coach helping fellow IBCLCs create fun, profitable businesses that are more than just an expensive hobby. Before becoming an IBCLC and starting her private practice - The Boobala, Tash graduated as an Osteopath in 2008 and has been in Private Practice in South West Sydney. She was also a volunteer Breastfeeding Counsellor and Community Educator with the Australian Breastfeeding Association for 6 years. Through her business, Your Lactation Biz, Tash coaches and creates products to help new and seasoned IBCLCs build businesses that suit their personality and lifestyle.

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