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How to deal with guilt of stopping breastfeeding?

Understanding the Guilt of Stopping Breastfeeding
For many mothers, the decision to stop breastfeeding can be fraught with emotional turmoil, often leading to feelings of guilt. This guilt can stem from societal pressures, personal expectations, or the belief that breastfeeding is the “best” choice for their child. However, it’s essential to recognize that these feelings are common and can be addressed constructively.
The Roots of Breastfeeding Guilt
Breastfeeding is often idealized in our culture, with numerous health organizations promoting its benefits. This can create an overwhelming sense of obligation for mothers to continue breastfeeding, even when it may not be feasible or desirable for them. As noted by experts, the pressure to conform to these ideals can lead to significant guilt when mothers choose to stop breastfeeding, whether due to personal choice, health issues, or lifestyle changes.
Acknowledging Your Feelings
The first step in dealing with breastfeeding guilt is to acknowledge your feelings. It’s perfectly normal to feel conflicted about stopping breastfeeding. Many mothers experience a mix of relief and sadness, and recognizing these emotions can be a crucial part of the healing process. Consulting with healthcare professionals, such as pediatricians or lactation consultants, can provide validation and support, helping mothers understand that their feelings are valid.
Reframing the Narrative
It’s important to reframe the narrative around breastfeeding. Stopping breastfeeding does not equate to failure; rather, it can be a necessary step for both mother and child. There are numerous reasons why a mother might choose to stop, including returning to work, personal health issues, or simply the need for more sleep. Emphasizing the positive aspects of this decision—such as the opportunity for shared feeding responsibilities with partners or caregivers—can help shift the focus from guilt to empowerment.
Embracing Self-Compassion
Practicing self-compassion is vital in overcoming guilt. Mothers should remind themselves that they are doing their best in a challenging situation. Life is filled with choices, and each decision made is based on the unique circumstances at hand. As one mother reflected, “Life is too short and too precious to feel guilty about things we cannot change”. Embracing this mindset can alleviate the burden of guilt and foster a more positive outlook on motherhood.
Seeking Support
Finally, seeking support from friends, family, or support groups can be incredibly beneficial. Sharing experiences with other mothers who have faced similar challenges can provide comfort and reassurance. It’s crucial to surround oneself with a supportive community that understands the complexities of motherhood and the diverse paths each mother may take.
Conclusion
In conclusion, while the guilt of stopping breastfeeding can be intense, it is essential to recognize that it is a common experience. By acknowledging feelings, reframing the narrative, practicing self-compassion, and seeking support, mothers can navigate this transition with grace and confidence. Ultimately, the well-being of both mother and child is what truly matters, and there are many ways to nurture that bond beyond breastfeeding.

Why do I feel so sad about stopping breastfeeding?

The change in mother-baby dynamic may leave you feeling a sense of loss you are not alone and this is a normal emotion. In addition to the social adjustment, there is also a chemical component with hormonal changes when mothers stop breastfeeding.

Will I lose weight after I stop breastfeeding?

It’s normal to store extra fat during pregnancy to be used up while breastfeeding. Mothers vary in when they lose this extra weight. For some it is in the early weeks, some later and for others it’s not until after they have stopped breastfeeding.

What happens to your body when you stop breastfeeding?

Some might experience headaches or migraines, while others feel exhausted or even dizzy immediately after weaning. Another common post-weaning issue? Acne. Big hormone changes can really throw your body for a loop.

Will I regret stopping breastfeeding?

Your feelings of regret about stopping breastfeeding early are normal and understandable, especially considering the challenges and emotions you’ve faced, including your baby’s health issues. Remember, many mothers go through similar situations and tough decisions.

How long does it take to feel normal after stopping breastfeeding?

Usually, you will feel back to normal after a few weeks but if you feel like your mood is very low it is important to contact your GP or maternal child health nurse.

How do I get over the guilt of stopping breastfeeding?

Take time to connect to your baby as they drink their formula — make it a special bonding moment. Reach out for support — you’re not alone, ever! Your friends and family can help, or even reach out to other mothers who struggled to breastfeed. Share your journey and reduce the stigma of not breastfeeding.

Will my baby love me less if I don’t breastfeed?

Bottle-feeding doesn’t affect your closeness
Yes, my son just wasn’t into breastfeeding. But, let me tell you, he’s so into me. Even at a year old, he wants me to hold him all the time.

At what age is it unhealthy to breastfeed?

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that mothers feed their babies only breast milk for six months and continue breastfeeding for at least one year. After that, it really depends on how long the mother and child want to continue.

How do I stop being sad about stopping breastfeeding?

Don’t Feel Bad About Your Feelings
It is important to remember that anything we have loved doing can make us sad to say goodbye to. This is totally normal. Take with you those memories of gazing at your baby’s beautiful face and watching them slip into sleepy land as they fed on you.

What is the best age to stop breastfeeding?

The World Health Organization recommends that all babies be exclusively breastfed for 6 months, then gradually introduced to appropriate foods after 6 months while continuing to breastfeed for 2 years or beyond. Stopping breastfeeding is called weaning. It is up to you and your baby to decide when the time is right.

Natasha Lunn

Tash is an IBCLC and Business Coach helping fellow IBCLCs create fun, profitable businesses that are more than just an expensive hobby. Before becoming an IBCLC and starting her private practice - The Boobala, Tash graduated as an Osteopath in 2008 and has been in Private Practice in South West Sydney. She was also a volunteer Breastfeeding Counsellor and Community Educator with the Australian Breastfeeding Association for 6 years. Through her business, Your Lactation Biz, Tash coaches and creates products to help new and seasoned IBCLCs build businesses that suit their personality and lifestyle.

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